The Eyes Have It

• 00:05 Let's move down from the top of our head a few inches to your eyes.
• 00:10 The eyes are critically important,
• 00:11 they're perhaps the most important part of your body language.
• 00:14 They speak so much.
• 00:16 If you get the eyes wrong, it's not gonna matter how good your clothes or
• 00:19 your hair are.
• 00:22 If you get your eyes right, that can cover up a lot of other problems.
• 00:26 Now, there are differences in various cultures.
• 00:29 So what I'm going to tell you does not apply to every single culture.
• 00:33 For starters,you need to figure out how do people use their
• 00:36 eyes in business situations in your culture.
• 00:39 I'm going to speak primarily on what happens in western cultures,
• 00:43 the United States, Europe, Australia.
• 00:46 Because those are the cultures I worked the most in with my clients.
• 00:51 Direct eye contact is considered the best way to go in most business situations.
• 00:58 You meet someone, you look them in the eye.
• 01:01 You're speaking to someone, you look in their eye most of the time.
• 01:07 There's the old expression,
• 01:08 I wouldn't trust a man or a woman who wouldn't look me in the eye.
• 01:12 You're giving a business presentation and you're staring at your notes or
• 01:16 you're staring at a PowerPoint slide.
• 01:18 Or you're looking up, or
• 01:19 you're nervous and you're looking at the clock, nobody's going to believe you.
• 01:23 Nobody's going to trust you.
• 01:26 Now you don't wanna stare somebody down, but
• 01:28 you do wanna look at them most of the time when you're talking to them.
• 01:33 Whether it's a cocktail party, a networking event, sitting down in a one
• 01:38 on one meeting or in a group, you want to share the eye contact.
• 01:43 When it comes to public speaking,
• 01:45 I'll give you some more advanced tips in that situation.
• 01:47 But for most business situations, informal situations even a formal meeting.
• 01:55 You need to be looking directly at someone most of the time
• 01:59 when you're talking to them.
• 02:01 When they're talking to you, you need to be looking at them.
• 02:05 So if you're shy, you're uncomfortable and
• 02:07 this happens if you're in front of someone really famous.
• 02:11 I remember when I was four years old, my idol, Mr.
• 02:17 Rogers from television's PBS Mr. Rogers' show, spoke at my kindergarten.
• 02:23 I was so overwhelmed by being in the presence of someone who was such a huge
• 02:28 celebrity in my world, I couldn't even look up.
• 02:32 I looked down in awe.
• 02:34 You don't wanna be that way in business, that's fine for a four-year-old or
• 02:37 a five-year-old.
• 02:39 If you're gonna be treated as serious and seen as credible.
• 02:44 You've got to look at someone as a peer, as an equal, as a friend.
• 02:49 Not too friendly, not overly familiar, but you do need to look at them.
• 02:54 Again, there are certain cultures where there's different,
• 02:58 figure out what is best in your culture and act accordingly.

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