Active Listening and Effective Communication

Quick reference

• 00:04 Welcome back.
• 00:05 In this lesson, we'll discuss the importance of active listening and
• 00:09 effective communication in resolving conflicts successfully.
• 00:14 Active listening is the process of fully concentrating, understanding, and
• 00:19 responding to a speaker while they are communicating.
• 00:23 And in today's world, with all the distractions we face,
• 00:26 it can be challenging to focus.
• 00:28 But in conflict resolution,
• 00:30 active listening is essential because it ensures that each party feels heard and
• 00:35 understood, it promotes empathy and relationship building.
• 00:39 And it prevents misunderstandings and miscommunications.
• 00:43 To practice active listening, consider using these techniques.
• 00:47 Number 1, pay full attention.
• 00:50 Focus on the speaker, avoid distractions, and maintain eye contact,
• 00:55 put the phone away, mute your notifications and focus.
• 01:01 Number 2, show that you're listening.
• 01:03 Use verbal or nonverbal cues like nodding and smiling, and
• 01:07 responding with I see or I understand when they speak.
• 01:12 And number 3, paraphrase.
• 01:14 If you can summarize or restate what the speaker just said,
• 01:17 it will confirm your understanding to them.
• 01:20 So it sounds like you're saying this and that, that shows you're listening,
• 01:25 and it also allows for clarification if necessary.
• 01:29 Number 4, ask open-ended questions.
• 01:32 Encourage the speaker to provide more information or clarify their thoughts, and
• 01:37 when they do, pay attention to the details and ask follow-up questions if necessary.
• 01:42 And number 5, reflect on emotions.
• 01:45 Acknowledge the emotions behind the speaker's words to show empathy.
• 01:50 Now, what does that mean?
• 01:53 If you're in a discussion or even an argument with a co-worker about
• 01:57 an important issue and they seem to be very frustrated, you should say,
• 02:02 it seems like you're pretty frustrated about this.
• 02:06 This is important because it shows them you recognize their feelings.
• 02:10 It doesn't necessarily mean you have to agree with them or
• 02:14 feel the same way, but showing empathy can help you connect.
• 02:19 Now beyond active listening, effective communication is crucial for resolving
• 02:25 conflicts, because it helps clearly express thoughts, feelings, and needs.
• 02:31 It fosters understanding and empathy between parties and
• 02:34 it facilitates collaborative problem-solving.
• 02:38 To communicate effectively in conflict situations, consider these techniques.
• 02:43 Use I statements, express your thoughts and feelings without placing any blame.
• 02:49 For example, I feel frustrated when deadlines are missed, not,
• 02:54 you're making me miss deadlines.
• 02:57 Be concise and clear, avoid using ambiguous language or jargon.
• 03:02 Don't use strange metaphors or make jokes,
• 03:05 be clear about what you want or what you want to suggest to the other party.
• 03:11 And watch your tone, maintain a calm, respectful, and non-confrontational tone.
• 03:17 But be aware of body language, ensure your facial expressions,
• 03:21 gestures, and posture convey a positive and open attitude.
• 03:26 And another thing, avoid using accusatory language,
• 03:30 this can escalate conflicts and create barriers.
• 03:34 Instead, focus on objective facts and express your feelings and
• 03:39 needs without making the other party feel attacked or blamed.
• 03:43 Let me give you an example.
• 03:45 An accusatory statement might sound like this,
• 03:48 you take too long submitting feedback and it's making us miss deadlines.
• 03:52 But the non-accusatory version of this would be something like,
• 03:56 I've noticed that sometimes the feedback gets submitted later than expected,
• 04:02 and it may impact our ability to meet deadlines.
• 04:06 Can we explore some strategies to make sure the feedback gets done earlier?
• 04:12 So that second version, the non-accusatory version, acknowledges the issue,
• 04:17 the delays in feedback, but it avoids placing direct blame on the listener.
• 04:22 It encourages collaboration to address the problem.
• 04:25 And a side note, check out the exercise for
• 04:28 this lesson to practice identifying accusatory language of your own.
• 04:34 Now one last thing, when you communicate in conflict situations,
• 04:38 you don't want to be aggressive, but you also don't want to be too passive.
• 04:43 Think about being assertive.
• 04:45 Assertive behavior involves standing up for your rights while respecting others.
• 04:50 Whereas aggressive behavior involves expressing your needs at the expense
• 04:56 of others, and it usually results in creating disrespect or hostility.
• 05:01 In our next lesson, we'll jump into identifying underlying issues in conflicts
• 05:06 and talk about various problem solving techniques to effectively resolve them.

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