Master the Art of Not Interrupting

• 00:04 Shut up, I'm sorry.
• 00:07 I realized that sounds rude, and
• 00:09 you're not supposed to tell people to shut up especially in the workplace.
• 00:14 But that is literally what I want you to do when you're listening to someone.
• 00:19 Too many of us, we hear a part of what someone said,
• 00:22 we want to show them we're smart, we're impatient.
• 00:26 So we hop right in, yeah, yeah, I got it and
• 00:28 actually we don't know what they're going to say, we interrupted them.
• 00:34 So, and I still face challenges with this,
• 00:37 I'll hear a prospect say something that I've heard a thousand times before,
• 00:42 and I just know where they're going and I might be right.
• 00:46 But if I interrupt them, when they've called me for
• 00:50 the first time, I run the risk of them thinking I'm rude.
• 00:55 And I run the risk of sending a message to them that,
• 00:59 this guy isn't really going to listen to us,
• 01:03 he's just there to give his generic stuff out.
• 01:07 So I want to caution you, you may think you're interrupting to be a part of
• 01:11 the conversation, you may think you're interrupting to show how smart you are,
• 01:16 because a brilliant question has popped up.
• 01:19 There are times to ask questions, but initially when someone
• 01:24 is speaking to you, let them finish their main point,
• 01:29 certainly do not interrupt them mid sentence.
• 01:33 It's rude, it will be perceived as rude, and you're going to mess up their flow,
• 01:39 they may be putting together a relatively complex argument for you.
• 01:44 Where the fourth point doesn't make sense outside
• 01:46 the context of the first three points.
• 01:49 And by interrupting them after the second point, going off over here to answer your
• 01:53 question, they never get to the third or fourth even though they thought they did
• 01:57 because they know they started talking about that.
• 02:00 So crucial to wait, wait until there's a pause,
• 02:05 wait until the person has finished most of it.
• 02:09 There's a lot of different signals we'll get into, but the biggest point right now,
• 02:15 don't interrupt when a client, customer, prospect, or boss is speaking to you.
• 02:22 One exception to my rule about not interrupting, if you genuinely
• 02:27 didn't hear someone, or you didn't understand what they were saying,
• 02:32 or they used a word that you just don't understand.
• 02:36 Then I think it is fine to say quickly, I apologize,
• 02:41 excuse me just a moment but, and then find out what it is they were saying.
• 02:47 Ask them politely, don't say you didn't say that clearly, just say excuse me,
• 02:52 I didn't understand what you said there.
• 02:54 Now, this happens on the phone a lot because people can be on cell phone
• 02:59 connections, something drops out.
• 03:02 And rather than let the person continue and you're confused,
• 03:06 I do think it's appropriate to say, excuse me, or pardon me, but
• 03:10 the last 20 seconds dropped out on the phone.
• 03:14 I didn't hear you, would you mind just restating it?
• 03:17 This is good for several reasons,
• 03:19 number one, it allows you to actually hear what they said, so
• 03:23 much better chance of understanding it, processing it, and remembering it.
• 03:27 Number two, you're letting the person know I really care
• 03:32 about what you're saying, I'm listening carefully.
• 03:37 I'm not just humoring you in doodling or off playing on Facebook.
• 03:41 I'm actually trying to understand you, and I'm paying close attention,
• 03:46 put those two things together, and it's going to work in your favor every time.
• 03:51 So don't be afraid to interrupt if it's for the explicit purpose of asking for
• 03:56 clarification because you just didn't hear something or you just didn't understand.

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